Saturday 12 November 2011

The Pain of Wisdom

So here is my first blog that kind’a personal and about me, without any link (tenuous or otherwise) to my writing.  I’m nervous, no scrap that, I’m bricking it!
Why? Well on Monday I’m going into hospital to have all four of my wisdom teeth extracted.
So what’s the big deal? You may say, well it goes like this. Last time I went in for an operation (a rather nasty procedure to saw my hip joint off and reattach it at another angle with copious amounts of metal screws) I managed to, wait for it…
…faint while under the general anaesthetic!
Yes I did say faint, while unconscious. This is no mean feat, and caused much excitement and disarray in the operating theatre when my blood pressure dropped dangerously low. Post-Op,  I was diagnosed with a heart  condition that make me predisposed to fainting, which was responsible for causing the commotion and therefore having to abort the op, but not before they had cut through my ligaments and muscles, (yes lots of pain, and absolutely no gain!)
So, I think I have reason to be anxious, even if it’s pointless and counterproductive, knowing that a plan is in place and it will be in a controlled environment where they are expecting it and are prepared.
However I’m still worrying and I couldn’t work out why. Then after quite a few restless nights I’ve figured it out. I’m not a young as what I once was (are any of us?) and that confidence and feeling of invincibility has been slowly whittled away. Also, I’m a mother and neuroticism is a prerequisite part of the role, so I’m wallowing on the worse case scenarios.
But with that solemn note, I’m going off to a book shop which always calms me down, to buy a stock of books to read while I’m feeling sorry for myself and looking like a punch-bag next week. 
So if anyone has any idea of how to get myself in a better frame of mind, or even has a distraction technique to stop me worrying, then please do share it with me!

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